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March 20, 2018


I wanted to write about this a few months ago but decided to forgo it because of the effect that this kind of story would bring to friendships everywhere. I don’t want to be the reason for multiple “Friendship breakdowns”.

But not too long ago, after reaching the 5,000th mark in Facebook, I noticed that there was an occasional trend. Every week, I would lose an average of 2 to 3 friends and a couple or so followers in Instagram.

Initially, I thought that it may have been a glitch of Facebook, but then I thought maybe it wasn’t. As far as I know, in order to “Unfriend” someone, you have to actually hover on the friend icon and click the option unfriend or unfollow to take that person out of your Friends list.

I’m sure that most of you don’t know this or maybe are oblivious about it, but I believe these are things should not go unnoticed. Friendships should be treated with respect and dignity so there is no excuse for this even if we live in such a digitally powered age.

So I did some app hunting in my iOS and compared it with its Android counterpart. I found two reliable applications that you will  need to keep your friends list updated (so that you know who silently deleted you, like a ninja, in their lives).

For Facebook, I use this App called “Who Deleted Me”. Here’s how it works. First, you log-in, just like how you would log-in when you opened Facebook for the first time.

Next, a window will open. You will see a bar that will indicate a loading of your Facebook details. When it’s done loading, the app will now be able to save your current Friends list.

You will then have to open the application on a different day to see if there were changes in your Friends list, such as: Missing Friends, Deactivated Friends, and New Friends.

Then, click on the Show Me Who option. A new window will pop open and you’ll see since your last visit in the app, the friend who unfriended you, deactivated you, and also see new friends you have added or accepted your friend request.

It’s quite fun and disturbing at the same time because, one, you’ll find out who doesn’t like you at that exact moment; and two, realize that the person who you thought is your friend isn’t your friend after all.

For Instagram, I use this application called “Followers”. It has the same log-in procedure, but this time the interface is just in one page. There are more options to choose from, starting with New Followers, Have Unfollowed You, Are Not Following You Back, and You Are Not Following Back. There are two other options if you pay a small sum: Blocking Me and Deleted Comments and Likes.

The dynamics of Instagram are very different from Facebook, so realizing fallen friendships here have a different psychological effect to the every user.

For some, Facebook is where people are more public than personal, while in Instagram some people tend to be more private than public or vise versa. Also, I believe that the systems operate in a different manner, so don’t take the discoveries personally.

I don’t really care much about the Twitter world because it’s a different type of social media all together, although it’s linked with both Facebook and Instagram, and it serves a different purpose while catering to a wider audience.

I hope that these tools of discovery will help you realize who your true friends are, especially in today’s really superficial and slow tempered world that we live in. The fact of the matter is that people are very dynamic and from time to time change occasionally. Like everything, friendships sometimes are for keeps but sometimes is there when it’s convenient.

In a modern and hi tech world that we live in, apps like these give us an insight on the behavioral changes of the people we consider friends and realize that maybe it’s high time to move on and pray for better friends to come by. If you decide to download this, I pray that you use it with caution, for I firmly believe that there some things for stress sake that are better left undiscovered.

As the saying goes, “Tell me who your friends are and I will tell you who you are”!

Have a great day, my friends, and may your friendships last a lifetime!




Photos from ABC Education, BGR Media LLC, Amazon, iTunes, 123 Greetings, Slate, Days of the Year, and Nico Garcia


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